Hell Froze Over. Again. Dvorak Still Agrees With Me.

Something is dreadfully wrong with the universe. 30 days ago master baiter and avowed Mac hater John Dvorak agreed with me.

Now he’s at it again and making common sense. Did someone steal a flux capacitor and put it into a Mac, travel back in time to right the Dvorak wrongs?

Seriously, this is the strangest phenomenon of the 21st century. Twice in 30 days John Dvorak has published an article which is difficult to argue against and not even fun to try.

Remember, this John Dvorak is the same guy who baits Mac users just to get hits on his online column. He must have figured he can do the same thing to the cellular phone companies.

30 days ago he blasted the cell phone companies, claiming they don’t like competition.

30 days later he claims the cell phone industry must die. It’s not just any old “die.” It’s DIE!

What’s that have to do with Macs? Work with me here. It’s a long shot but consider all the elements. Apple makes OS X which resides on Macs. Apple puts OS X on the new iPhone. Dvorak says the industry that Apple wants to play in must die.

I see an opportunity for gratis placement of an iPhone from Apple, as Dvorak starts off by saying, “I hate mobile phones and think they are the bane of modern society.”

What’s wrong with that? They’re certainly an evil necessity but he’s got a point. Cell phones are a pain in the ear.

Most of John’s tirade against the industry is against the use of the phone, the phone’s features, fashionable phones, phone etiquette (or lack of), and phone users. Especially users.

Everything having anything to do with cell phones, including customers and phone features, gets dumped into the “industry” which then gets disparaged by Tweedle D’s poison pen.

What’s interesting is that he makes a lot of sense, and I venture to say the only hope for the industry is Apple’s new iPhone, which, Mac360 readers and future iPhone purchasers and wannabe purchasers, comes with a version of OS X inside.

If people don’t mind whipping out their sleek RAZRS and Chocolates and Black Jacks and wannabe smart phones to impress everyone with how chic and cool they are, what’ll happen when the iPhone hits the streets?

Let’s thank Steve Jobs and the iPhone development team for not including Skype with video in the iPhone.

That would be just too much to handle with millions of iPhone users whipping out their sleekest of sleek gadgets, pointing the camera at themselves, primping and foo fooing for video action, then communicating in audio and full motion video Technicolor.

John is right. Most cell phone users are too caught up in the moment of the call and fail to recognize the social problems caused by “I need to take this” or the showy display of the phone’s gadgetry.

Once the iPhone is launched it will only be worse. Instead of people standing around and thinking how rude some phone users are, they’ll stand in line to touch it, or get a peek at it. Your iPhone. What did you think I meant?

With all that an iPhone can do, and do much easier than a so-called smart phone, cell phone etiquette will end up as a notation in Wikipedia.

Dvorak is right but has the wrong solution. The only solution is to do away with all cell phones except—except Apple’s iPhone. Then communicative peace will reign.

update Just when I thought Dvorak was gaining common sense he comes up with this one regarding the iPhone. It’s just more proof that the man knows how to pull chains.