How to Build A Hot Desktop Mac That Costs $17,000.

Did you drool when Apple’s new Intel-based MacBook Pro was announced? Did you swoon when Apple released the 24-inch iMac?

What happened to your pants when they shipped the quad core MacPro? Here’s how to build the most expensive Mac ever. It’s so easy I’ve been checking my credit card balance to see if there’s room.

Don’t tell me you haven’t tried this. I know you have. It’s a genetic thing for humans to price out the most expensive toy we’d love to have but would never buy.

I admit to doing it more than once when Apple releases new models just a month after I bought an older model. Do what, dear Alex, you ask?

Hit the Apple Store online and build out the most expensive Mac that your money will never buy. How about tricking out a MacPro to the tune of $17,000?

It’s easy and takes only minutes to blow away a lot more money than you’ll ever make back in spreadsheets, PowerPoint presentations, and Word documents.

Here’s how it works. Head to the Apple Store online, click on the MacPro icon and start buying whatever you really want. My favorite is the $17,000 version of a MacPro.

First, there’s no way I need that much Mac, though that never stopped me from wanting that much Mac. Wants and needs are not the same, right?

Second, even for graphics and web work and Microsoft Office and Adobe whatever, a Core 2 Duo iMac with a bunch of RAM and big hard drive is fine.

From what I can tell, you can buy a MacPro with dual 2.0Ghz Dual-Core Intel Xeons for about $2,000.

Where’s the fun in that? It’s not tricked out, pimped up or even imaginative. Here’s what you must do. You must.

Let’s go for broke. Literally. It’s a mere $799 extra for the MacPro with two 3.0Ghz dual-Core Intel Xeons. That’s four cores. Buy it now, get it next week, and have it be obsolete the week after. That’s the American way.

Just going for the faster CPU’s brings the total to almost $3,300. That would be enough for most of us, but if you’ve got plenty of room on that credit card balance, let’s see how far you dare go.

RAM is all important these days. There’s no reason you can’t run every application made for Mac OS X. All at the same time. For that, you’ll need plenty of RAM and the MacPro will hold up to 16 gigs of RAM, for a modest $5,699 from the Apple Store build to order.

Just one click and we’ve more than doubled the price of the MacPro to almost $9,000. Can RAM actually be more expensive than the whole MacPro? Yes. Apple’s RAM is magic RAM and has personally been blessed by Steve Jobs. Magic costs more. Blessing costs lots.

Since we’re sticking with Apple’s build-to-order options, and the MacPro has four slots for hard drives, let’s fill those suckers up with top of the line 750 gigabyte Serial ATA drives-- Only $599 each from Apple.

Yes, I believe they’re magic drives and have received Steve’s blessing, too. At least, he’ll bless these overpriced bit monsters once your credit card clears.

Four big honkin’ hard drives get the total MacPro price to over $11,000. Trust me. That’s a bargain. I’ve got a lot of digital pictures in iPhoto. Having a baby will tax iPhoto’s database limit, so you need a RAID backup plan.

How about graphics? Is there a better way to view your digital photos and movies and DVDs than Apple displays and matching NVIDIA Quadro FX 4500 graphics card? I swear, this beauty is so hot it comes with its own refrigerator-- currently on back order. Add yet another $1,649 for a total of $12,842.

That’s a far cry from a really tricked out, pimped up MacPro, so let’s add the displays.

Two of them. That’s two of them at 30-inches each. At $1,999 each. Each. Now we’re pushing that $17,000 price tag.

Every Mac should have two SuperDrives, not one. Add another $99. My Mac has Bluetooth and AirPort Extreme, so should this MacPro. That’s another $79. We’re almost there.

Add a USB modem and the Apple wireless keyboard and wireless Might Mouse and we top out at $17,126. I think there’s free shipping with that. There should be a free Kia. $17,126.

If Michael Dell knew you’d pay that much for a Mac he’d kick out his CEO and come back to run Dell himself… hmmm. There’s something oddly familiar about that scenario.

The Apple Store notes that sales tax or rebates are not included. Tax here in California will probably cost me my first born male child. Wait. Make that my second male child. The first born is going to be sold to pay for a year’s supply of gasoline.

I’m encouraged by Apple to place my order for as low as $405 a month on a Juniper Visa Card. I still haven’t added software to my dream Mac. The best deal in this imaginary journey is AppleCare Protection Plan. A $17,000 computer with everything except chocolate topping and a maraschino cherry costs a mere $249 for AppleCare.

Don’t tell me you haven’t gone to the Apple Store and tricked out your own Mac Of My Freakin’ Dreams™ because I’m sure you have, even if late at night when no one was looking.

Wanna have some more fun? An iBook starts at $1,099. How much can you load up on a MacBook Pro? Not much. These buggers are cheap at barely $3,500 without an external display.

What about a Mac mini? Loaded with RAM, 20-inch Apple Cinema Display, wireless keyboard and mouse, largest hard drive available, and AppleCare tossed in, it’s barely over… well, I’ll let you enjoy pimping out something you might really be able to afford.

Care to share with the rest of us what your dream Mac would be, fully loaded, ready to be hand carried to your home by Apple CFO Peter Oppenheimer? Share in the Comments section below.

The folks at Mac360 have a few domains for sale. If you've ever dreamed of setting up and running your own site about Apple, the Mac, iPods or the iPhone, this is a great way to get started. Click here for the basic details, and click AppleScene, iPhoneKillerTips, or ChatterMac for a more complete list.