Unfortunately for Apple watchers, the truth sometimes takes refuge in imaginary tales which often pose as facts. Fact, Apple will release a new version of the iPhone soon. Alright, that’s a prediction of a fact not yet in evidence.
iWatch, iGlasses, iWhat?
Technology pundits use a decidedly non-technological methodology to gaze into Apple’s future. Think of a mashup of tea leaves, a crystal ball, and palm reading.
That, and the latest pharmaceuticals that promise enlightenment. How else do you explain the current online comparisons of Samsung’s as-yet-unannounced smart watch with Apple’s as-yet-unannounced smart watch?
Samsung isn’t known much for design esthetics but pundits predict the Korean company will launch a smart watch before Apple’s famed iWatch. Does that make Apple the copier or the copyee?
What’s next? Google’s Glass attempts to bring digital functionality to a pair of glasses that don’t appear to provide users with optical enhancements, but wearable technology appears to be on the way, whether we like it or not.
Based on the number of locations already banning Glass, is it likely that Apple’s iGlasses will receive an equally cool reception?
Alright, Apple is interested in wearable technology, as evidenced by CEO Tim Cook’s public pronouncement that Apple is interested in wearable technology.
So far, this nascent market isn’t setting the world on fire, but it’s having an effect. The professionals who guesstimate how many iPhones and iPads and smartphones and tablets will be sold are revising their estimates downward to include the impact of tens of millions of wearable technology devices.
Who needs another smartphone or tablet when everything we need to see and do can be had with a glance to the wrist, or the blink of an eye? One prognosticator predicted Apple will sell 65-million iWatches in 2014.
My Apple crystal ball says not to count on more than 58,274,329 units. Seriously? 65-million units of a product that’s a purely speculative non-announcement? Kate to pundits: ‘Please be sure to sanitize after you pull numbers out of your ass.’
iWatch. iGlasses. They are so yesterday.
Apple’s future lies in artificial limbs, robot technology, and implantable transferable intelligence. Download your consciousness to the latest Apple Mac iPro, then have it transferred and embedded into a new artificial iBody which looks like the movie star or athlete of your choice. But get the extended iBody AppleCare warranty. iBody is not available for online download. Prices slightly higher in California and New York, not available in Texas or states with a Republican legislature. Patents pending. Order now.